Wild for You (Crave Book 2) Page 22

  I gasped as he pressed into me. His hands shifted me against him, lowering me down just enough.

  Then he was inside me, moving hard and deep as his mouth clung to mine. I clasped his neck with one hand and reached between us with the other, spreading my fingers apart so I could feel him as he entered me.

  He groaned into my mouth and then pulled back just far enough to whisper, "If you don't stop that, I'm going to come."

  I had no problem with that but I knew from experience that he would fight the urge and wait until I came and I wasn't quite there yet.

  I nipped his bottom lip and moved my fingers upward, circling my clit with two.

  "Oh, fuck. You're getting tighter," he muttered, his hands gripping my hips harder as he pounded into me. "Please tell me your close."

  I was. The edge shimmered before me, pulling me closer, tempting me to leap over. My breath left my lungs in pants and short moans as I struggled for release. It hovered there, just out of my reach.

  My head fell back and I arched into him. I needed more. Something.

  Ben lowered his head and lifted me just enough to lightly bite my nipple through my shirt.

  I broke, the tension snapping like a spring wound too tightly. Light burst behind my eyes and I cried out as the orgasm ripped through me. Ben crashed into me, a loud groan escaping his mouth where it rested against my breast.

  I clung to him as my body shuddered from the intense pleasure. Ben held me pinned against the wall, panting as the vestiges of his own climax faded away. His hands lowered me and then we were both on the cool wood floor, sweaty and too exhausted to move.

  Somehow I ended up sprawled over his body with him still inside me. I had no idea how he had the strength to keep us from crashing to the ground because my muscles were about as useful as cooked noodles.

  Hmmm. Spaghetti sounded good right about now.

  His hands caressed my back as I hummed and he asked, "What are you thinking about?"

  "Spaghetti," I answered, both hungry and sleepy. Maybe I could eat after a nap.

  Ben chuckled. "Really? Because I just realized that I completely forgot about a condom."

  I lifted my head from where it rested on his shoulder and looked down at him. "Well, I'm on the pill but we should probably get tested before we do that again, just to be sure."

  He nodded, his hands holding my ribs. "Sounds good. Definitely better than spaghetti."

  "Nothing's better than spaghetti with you. Naked and in bed."

  He smiled up at me, the corners of his hazel eyes crinkling, as if he found my weirdness endearing. "I could probably arrange that. In a little while."

  "Why not now?" I asked, blinking as a drop of sweat rolled down my forehead and into the corner of my eye.

  "Because I can't feel my legs," he replied.

  "That's my line."

  The smile remained on his face, but it changed as he lifted a hand and cupped my cheek.

  "I love you, Sierra."

  I closed my eyes for a moment as those words settled in my heart. It was the first time he'd said them and I hadn't felt the icy fingers of fear grip me. Then I opened them again so I could meet his gaze when I said, "And I love you too, Ben."

  "Is it that difficult to say?" he asked.

  I shook my head. "I'm just not used to saying those words to anyone."

  He pulled me down for a kiss. "Then maybe you should practice. We'll start with twice a day and work our way up from there."

  I pinched his nipple in punishment, but he only laughed and rolled us so that I lay beneath him.

  The floor was cold beneath my back and I hissed when my overheated skin pressed into it.

  "That wasn't nice," I said, pouting a little.

  "Let me make it up to you."

  Then, he kissed me and I completely forgot about the floor.

  At least until he lifted his head and looked down at me. The corners of his mouth curled slightly.

  "So, since you're in love with me now, will you tell me about your tattoo?"

  I laughed and pulled him down so that my mouth was right against his ear. "It says No secrets."

  He pulled away and frowned. "That's it?"

  I had to laugh again. "I can see that you're let down but you should consider whose secrets I'm referring to—mine or yours."

  Ben dropped a little more of his weight on me and I grunted, which made him smirk. "I have nothing to hide from you, so I'm guessing those words apply to your secrets."

  "When it comes to you, I have no secrets."

  I hadn't intended the words as a declaration of love when I'd gotten them inked into my skin, but they were.

  Our heart's desires, the things we craved but held so deeply inside of ourselves that we rarely admitted them aloud—those were the secrets worth sharing.

  And when I gave my heart to Ben, I shared them with someone who would guard them fiercely and forever.

  24

  Two hours later, I was freshly showered, again, and my ass was planted on the countertop next to the stove in Ben's kitchen. He'd set me up there and given me a glass of water because my stomach started growling so loudly that I couldn't ignore it anymore.

  And he made me spaghetti.

  Watching him cook something for me just because I wanted it, well, it hit me right in the gut. I'd told him what I wanted and he made it happen.

  And he'd been doing that for me since the beginning. I had missed the obvious because I was too scared of my own emotions to evaluate his actions.

  His actions expressed his love for me just as effectively as his words.

  My heartbeat stuttered in my chest when it hit me that I'd almost run away from this.

  This man and his love were worth the risk. He was worth everything inside me.

  Ben's voice pulled me out of my deep thoughts when he asked, "So what things are you good at that helped Cam and Brody?"

  I blinked at him several times, my exhausted brain taking a moment to catch up with the question. Then, it clicked. "Oh, I'm good at finding information. Especially on the internet."

  His hands paused in the process of opening a jar of tomato sauce. "What exactly does that mean?"

  I tried to look innocent but knew I failed when he sighed.

  "Please just tell me you didn't commit any felonies."

  "Um...."

  "Never mind. Am I going to have to hide you from the feds?"

  I shook my head. No way. I'd covered my tracks well enough. I hadn't stolen anything or messed with her information. I'd just looked at it, printed out things I thought would be helpful, and snuck back out. Though once I saw how much Brody was paying her every month, I was seriously tempted to drain her bank account and donate the proceeds to a shelter or food bank, but I figured she would need the money once Brody was through with her. Even if she didn't deserve it, she was Jacks' mom and I loved that little girl. I didn't want to do anything to make Jacks' life any more difficult than it already was. And considering some of the things I'd found out about her mom...well, she definitely had it rough when she wasn't with her dad.

  Ben studied me with narrowed eyes before he finally dumped the sauce in a pan and turned on the burner beneath it. "Let me know if that changes."

  I grinned at him, which made him sigh. "You're dying to know what I found out, aren't you?"

  Ben shook his head. "I've already talked to Brody. He told me about the case he's building against Monica." He came over to me and put his palms on the counter on either side of my hips, leaning into me. "You helped my brother more than you'll ever know."

  My breath trembled when he kissed me, not because it was hot or sexy, but from the underlying tenderness in his lips. He kissed me like he cherished me.

  "Thank you," he whispered.

  "I did it for Cam. And for Jacks." His hazel eyes warmed, only inches from mine. "Okay, and for you and Brody, too, but don't get a big head about it."

  Ben pushed himself upright but he was smiling. "I know."

&n
bsp; I waited a beat as he moved back to the stove and added pasta to the boiling water. "I'm sorry I acted like an idiot."

  I'd apologized before but we hadn't talked about it again since he'd grabbed me and ravished me. I didn't want any bad feelings to fester. For the first time in my life, I was starting what I hoped would be a permanent relationship. I wanted our foundation to be strong.

  Ben glanced at me, but he didn't look angry. Not anymore. "I'm sure we'll both act like idiots at one point or another during our relationship."

  Okay, so that wasn't accepting my apology but he talked about our future like it was a given. I took that as a good sign.

  Still, I didn't want this hanging over my head. "So we're good? You're not mad at me anymore?"

  Ben froze and looked up at me. "I wasn't mad at you, Sierra. I was hurt."

  Shit. How could a guy who looked like him also have his emotional shit together too? It was too weird. He could have been a fitness model, but his true strength lay in his heart and mind.

  "I'm sorry I hurt you." I had to bite back a sniffle because I suddenly wanted to cry again.

  He moved back over to me. "And I'm sorry I hurt you." He cupped my cheeks with his hands. "If you can forgive me for that, I can definitely forgive you."

  His thumbs brushed away the tears that trickled from my eyes.

  "Just so you know, I hardly ever cry," I stated, sniffing again. "If you do something to make me mad in the future, I'm much more likely to seek revenge than sob on your shoulder." I considered my words. "Actually, if you make me mad and then I start crying, you should probably run."

  Ben smiled at me and wiped my tears again. "I'll keep that in mind. And I'll deserve it if I make you that angry."

  "Liar," I mumbled. "I'm not known for being reasonable so there's no guarantee you'll deserve it."

  He laughed. "Are you trying to be honest or scare me away?"

  "You should know what you're getting into," I stated. My voice was prim, which I didn't like, but he needed the information.

  "I've heard all about you from J.J. and Cam over the years, I'm pretty sure I know what I'm getting when it comes to you."

  I squinted at him. "I'm not sure if that sounds like a compliment."

  Ben kissed me again and released me when the timer for the pasta went off. He drained the pasta and tossed it into the pan with the tomato sauce. Then he pulled the garlic bread out of the oven where it had been warming.

  "Believe me, it is."

  "Hmph."

  He grinned at me again but didn't say anything else. I watched as he sliced the bread and retrieved grated parmesan cheese from the fridge. I fidgeted with the hem of the shirt I'd borrowed.

  Finally, I couldn't keep my mouth shut any longer.

  "So what do we do now?" I asked.

  He paused, cocking his head as he looked at me. "Why does asking that question make you so nervous?"

  My knee-jerk reaction was sarcasm, but I swallowed it back. There was a time and a place for my smart mouth and this wasn't one of them. Huh. Maybe I could learn how to be an adult after all.

  "Probably because this is all new to me," I answered.

  He set aside the cheese and the grater and walked over to me. "How about you tell me what you want, and then I'll tell you what I want. If we don't agree on certain things, we'll compromise?"

  At this distance, I could see the individual gold flecks in his eyes. They were so pretty, with the dark green around the pupil and the lighter brown on the edges. But, right now, what I loved the most about those eyes was the fact that they were warm. The affection and contentment in his gaze were contagious and my nerves melted away. Not completely, but enough.

  "I like the way things were before, but we could actually go on dates. As long as I don't have to wear a dress." The corners of his eyes crinkled when he smiled. Fuck it. He said he loved me, so I was going all in. "And if things are still good in a few months, I'd like to get a place together."

  "Is that it?" he asked.

  I nodded. "I'm a simple girl. It doesn't take much to make me happy."

  "I want to see you every day. To wake up with you in the morning and go to sleep beside you every night," he said. "I want your clothes in my closet, your laptop on my coffee table, and three different kinds of Coke in my fridge because you like them all and can't choose just one."

  My heart beat faster in my chest at his words. It sounded like he wanted me to move in with him.

  "And, in a few months, when things are still good, I definitely want you living here and wearing a wedding ring. In a couple of years, I'd love to have a baby with you."

  Forget beating faster, my heart was trying to race out of my chest. I gulped. "Baby?"

  "Well, ideally, two, but I'd settle for one if you decided one was enough."

  "I don't know anything about parenting," I said, a sweat breaking out on my upper back. "I'd probably be horrible at it."

  Ben grinned and shrugged. "I don't know anything about parenting either, apart from watching Jacks drive Brody crazy. But you're a genius and I'm not a complete idiot so I think we could figure it out."

  I'd never thought about having kids before.

  "If kids are a deal-breaker—" he started

  "They're not," I interrupted. I cleared my throat. "I just never considered it so it's a bit of an adjustment."

  I tried to envision being pregnant, but my brain couldn't wrap around that. But I could imagine holding a baby with Ben's eyes. A baby that would grow up with Ben as his or her father. Despite what he said, I knew he would be an amazing father. He was patient, loving, and incredibly hands-on.

  "I'll have to think about it longer than thirty seconds, but I'd definitely be willing to consider it in the future," I admitted.

  Ben smiled at me. "That's all I could ask for."

  I didn't bring up what he said about marriage. The baby thing had thrown me for a loop, but surprisingly, I didn't mind the idea of being married to Ben.

  I understood then. This was for real. For the first time, the idea of being tied to someone in a permanent way didn't terrify me. Well, it did, but not in the same way. I didn't feel trapped. I was afraid I would mess it up.

  The fear was so sharp that I grabbed Ben's hands, holding them tightly. "Please just promise me one thing."

  "If it's in my power, I will."

  I took a deep breath. "If I'm screwing things up, or if I'm doing something wrong, please talk to me. Give me a chance to fix it before you give up on me."

  Ben released my hands and pulled me into his arms. "Hey, don't cry. That is definitely something I can promise." He hugged me tightly. "If things aren't good, we'll always talk about it."

  "I'm not—" I touched my cheek and stopped talking. Shit, I was crying. I leaned deeper into him. "I don't think I could stand it if this goes bad."

  "Then we'll both work on keeping it good. Right?"

  I nodded, my cheek against his shoulder.

  He released me and cupped my cheeks with his hands, wiping away a few stray tears with his thumbs. "I'm in this just as deep as you are, Sierra. You're not the only one who's vulnerable and afraid, okay?"

  The breath I took was jerky and shallow, but it helped enough that I could speak. "Okay."

  Ben kissed me, light and sweet. "Let's focus on right now and I promise you it will work out in the end."

  I curled my fingers around his strong wrists, holding on to him. "Don't break my heart, Ben Murphy."

  He kissed me again. "I won't, Sierra Watkins. I promise."

  Epilogue

  One Year Later

  I laughed as Brody dragged Cam out onto the dance floor. Like me, Cam hated dancing, but Brody declared that she would dance with him at their wedding and he refused to back down.

  She gave in, probably because there was no place she would rather be than in his arms, but it was with an eye roll and a sigh. But I still noticed the way that she melted against him and nestled her head into the curve where his neck and shou
lder met.

  Ben put his arm around me. "Care for a spin around the dance floor?"

  I laughed again. "You're hilarious."

  "I'm not kidding," he said, pulling me toward the open area in the center of the party barn.

  Yep. That's right. My best friend and her man were having their reception in a party barn. I thought Ben's parents were going to have a coronary when they found out, and I was right. They'd done everything they could to try and talk Brody into scheduling the wedding and reception at the country club. Like his first wedding.

  When that failed, they'd gone after Cam, who sweetly explained to them that considering how his previous marriage had gone, they preferred to start their marriage differently.

  Then she stood her ground. And finally stopped taking their calls.

  I'd secretly hoped they'd boycott the wedding, but it was futile. No way in hell would Mr. and Mrs. Murphy let it be known that they refused to come to their oldest son's wedding to the town's ice cream queen. The humiliation would be too great.

  So they were here, with sour expressions on their faces, and sitting like statues at the parents' table.

  "Ben, if you value the safety of your feet, you won't do this," I warned him, my voice low.

  "Are you threatening to stomp on my toes?" he asked.

  "No, I'm telling you that I'm a horrible dancer and that I've been known to accidentally break bones because I have no rhythm and I can't follow a lead worth a damn."

  Ben laughed and pulled me around in front of him so my body was pressed against his. He arranged my hands so that one rested on the back of his neck and he clasped the other against his chest. "Then we'll just stand here and sway together."

  That I could do. In fact, it would be a beautiful memory for my collection.

  That's right. I collected memories now. I had very few good ones of my childhood, and most of the best ones from my adult years featured Cam.

  And now Ben.

  I never wanted to forget how much I loved and needed him, so I made a point to focus on moments like this. The moments that made up a beautiful life.

  I breathed in his scent, memorized the warmth and strength of his chest beneath my hand, and the soft yellow glow of the fairy lights strung above the dance floor in a delicate web.