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As soon as Lach finished washing dishes, he moved to his bag, digging around inside it for a few minutes. Then he disappeared into the bathroom.
When the door shut behind him, I sighed softly and closed my book. I’d been reading the same paragraph since I opened it anyway. I lay on my side, staring at the wall in front of me and listening to the sound of running water as it beat down on the porcelain tub.
Before I realized it was happening, I was asleep.
The thrashing sound woke me. I lay completely still, forcing myself to breathe slowly and deeply as though I were still asleep, and listened. Had someone broken into the cabin?
Then I heard it again, followed by a low growl that raised a chill on my skin. The growl deepened and grew louder, until it seemed to shake the cabin.
It took me a moment to realize that it was coming from the sofa. When I did, I sat up and saw that Lachlan was moving restlessly.
I climbed out of bed, moving slowly toward him. “Lachlan,” I called. “You need to wake up.”
He didn’t respond. He was too lost in the nightmare.
“Ian!” I shouted.
Nothing except a short break in the growl before it resumed, louder and more vicious than before.
I saw the agonized expression on his face and my heart hurt. I knew he had dreamt of the night that Belinda died for months afterward. Finally after about a year, he’d convinced me that the nightmares didn’t come very often any longer.
As I watched him writhe it became clear to me that he’d lied so that people would stop asking him about them.
Bracing myself, I moved closer to him. I didn’t want to touch him while he was in the throes of a bad dream. It could result in one or both of us getting hurt, but it was clear that he wouldn’t wake up any other way and I couldn’t let him continue with that horrible dream.
I reached out, standing just behind his head, and clasped his shoulder, shaking it firmly. “Lachlan, it’s Chloe. Wake up!”
Just as I knew he would, he snarled and turned on me in a flash, his body tackling me to the ground. His eyes were open, but he wasn’t seeing me, his brain still locked in the past.
His fingers dug into my hips, causing me to cry out in pain. I didn’t want to fight him. He was hurting enough and I didn’t want to cause more agony. Instead, I lifted my hands and cupped his cheeks.
“Lachlan,” I whispered. “You’re safe. You need to wake up.”
Without thinking, I moved my thumb and it brushed across his lower lip.
Immediately, he stilled. His hands still held me a shade too tightly, but it no longer hurt. His chest moved rapidly as he panted. He was poised between sleep and wakefulness.
“It’s Chloe, Lach. You need to wake up and talk to me,” I commanded softly.
Slowly, his eyelids lifted and he looked down at me, his eyes glassy. “Chloe?”
“I’m here, Ian.”
He collapsed on me then, his body trembling violently as he sucked in deep, broken gasps. I felt the dampness of tears on my shoulder and I wrapped my arms and legs around him, cradling him close. He needed my comfort, however I could give it to him.
“I’m here, I’m here,” I crooned softly. “You were dreaming. It’s okay.”
His hands released my hips and he shoved them beneath me, holding me so tightly I could barely breathe.
“Chloe,” he whispered. “Oh God, Chloe.”
I didn’t ask him what he’d dreamed about because I knew. His nightmares were always about the mate that he’d had and lost. The mate he would have given anything to hold once again.
My heart broke for us both because we were never going to get what we yearned for most—the other half of our soul.
Chapter Ten
Lachlan
I clutched Chloe tighter to me, my heart pounding so hard against my sternum that I was sure it would break free of my chest.
The dream had begun the same as it always had. Belinda and I were fighting off the wolves that had sided with the Faction. There were too many of them for me to take on alone and there was no way to escape. As I’d ripped at my opponents with teeth and claws, I could see the flashes of light as Belinda fought them with magic.
Just as I’d begun to believe we might win, that she would be safe, I heard her scream. I whirled in time to see a partially shifted wolf lift her in his grasp and give a sharp slash with his claws.
Howling with rage, I’d torn apart any shifters that tried to stop me from getting to my mate. The sight of her blood covering the floor and the wolf that held her drove me to madness. He dropped her body as I approached and bared his fangs at me.
Without hesitation, I pounced on him. In my fury, I raked at him with my teeth and rent his flesh with my claws. He couldn’t defend himself against the murderous rage that poured through me. I never felt his blows because I was consumed with madness and the compulsion to destroy him.
When he finally lay motionless beneath me, nothing left of him but blood and bones, I climbed off his body. With shaking hands, I lifted Belinda, cradling her in my lap as I brushed her hair away from her face.
This time the dream was different. The pale features that lay in the crook of my arm didn’t belong to my mate.
It was Chloe, deathly still, her body covered in the blood that had poured from her torn throat.
When her voice pierced through the haze of my dream, the emotions that roared through me were indescribable. She was here now, warm and alive, her arms and legs wrapped around me and holding me close.
I felt the tears falling from my eyes but I couldn’t bring myself to give a shit. All that mattered was that she was safe.
My body shook with violent shudders as the dregs of the dream faded away, leaving me cold and empty. Slowly, I became aware of the lean muscles of Chloe’s thighs where they cradled my hips and the lavender scent of her hair. Unlike the perfume on the note, this fragrance was lighter and carried the undertones of Chloe’s own scent.
I inhaled again, my nose brushing her shoulder, letting her presence soothe me.
Suddenly, I realized that my body was reacting to her. My cock began to harden. It had been nearly two years since I felt my blood stir this way.
Shocked, I released her abruptly, which was almost worse. The t-shirt she wore clung to her breasts and without my body pressed against hers, the cool air caused her nipples to harden. Her hair was spread around her on the floor as though she’d been lying beneath me for a very different reason.
“Did I hurt you?” I asked, my voice rough. I sat back, leaning against the bottom of the couch and bending my knees to hide my erection.
“No,” she whispered, slowly sitting up.
I wanted to reach out and help her, especially when I saw the way she winced and favored her ribs. Instead, I snapped, “I thought you said I didn’t hurt you.”
She stared at me, a frown tugging her brows down. “My ribs are a little bruised, but I’m not truly hurt. It’ll heal up in a matter of minutes.”
“Dammit, Chloe. You know you shouldn’t touch me when I’m having a nightmare. Why didn’t you yell or call my name?”
“I did,” she answered shortly, pushing herself off the floor and to her feet. “You didn’t wake up.”
“Well, turn on the light or throw something at me next time,” I snarled.
She moved to the cabinet next to the sink and took out two glasses, filling them with water from the tap. “Don’t worry, I will,” she growled back, bringing a glass to me and handing it over with a fierce scowl.
I took the water from her, feeling even more like as asshole. “Thank you,” I mumbled.
“You’re welcome.” She moved over to the trunk at the end of the bed and sipped her own water. “Do you want to watch some TV or something?”
I drained the glass and shook my head. “No. Just go back to sleep, Chloe. I’ll be fine.”
She didn’t speak for a long moment, but I could feel her eyes on me. I tensed, waiting for her to say somet
hing, to ask me if I would be okay. To my surprise, she sighed and got up, walking around the bed.
There was a rustle of sheets as she slid beneath the covers and settled. She remained silent, the still air stretching until the quiet vibrated with all the unspoken words between us.
I sat on the floor, my back against the couch, and listened to her breathe until I knew she had fallen back asleep. It was only then that I got up and lay on the sofa, staring up at the ceiling until the moonlight gave way to the rising sun.
The whisper of the screen door shutting woke me up. It took me a moment to remember where I was and what had happened last night. Grunting in disgust, I sat up on the couch and scrubbed my face with my hands. I saw that there was half a pot of coffee left and the clock said it was just after ten.
I must have fallen asleep after the sun came up, I realized. That surprised me. I usually couldn’t sleep again after a nightmare. If I’d been alone in the cabin, I would have turned on every light in the place and paced the floor until dawn. Or I would have gone for a long, punishing run in wolf form. Unfortunately, I could do neither last night.
Getting to my feet, I walked on silent feet to the front door and looked outside. Then I froze. Chloe stood in the front yard with her back to me, naked. Her long hair gleamed in the sunlight, the dark blonde illuminated by the rays until the strands took on a hue of pure honey. Her long body was curved in all the right places and packed with lean muscle.
Unable to look away, I watched as she lifted her arms above her head and gave a cat-like stretch, which should have looked strange on a wolf shifter, but it didn’t.
No, it was sexy as hell.
I took several steps away from the door then, backing into the kitchen until I could no longer see her. What the fuck was I doing? Staring at Chloe and thinking she was sexy?
My gut twisted with guilt and horror. I had no right to look at a female with lust. Not after what I had with Belinda. Now that I knew the touch of a true mate, nothing else would fill the void left behind.
A streak of brown out the kitchen window caught my eye and I realized Chloe must have shifted and gone for a run.
The guilt inside me morphed into something darker and uglier—anger. Chloe knew that we were being watched, and possibly in danger, yet she went for a run alone, without telling me.
I let that ire build within me until my temper snapped. Snarling, I tore off the pajama pants and briefs I wore and ran out the door. As I bounded off the porch, I felt my body shifting and changing. Within a few strides, I was running on four paws, following the scent of lavender and Chloe.
Chapter Eleven
Chloe
As I ran through the woods in wolf form, I let the human part of my brain wander back to last night. Remembering things I had no business thinking about.
After Lachlan had calmed down, he’d lain on top of me, just holding me. I’d relished his weight and his heat as his breathing slowed and his trembling subsided.
Then I’d felt it growing against my core. His cock. Whether his mind agreed, his body wanted me.
Part of me wanted to howl in triumph, but I was also terrified. He was still off balance and learning to live once more. His body coming to life again would only make it more difficult for him to cope. He needed more time to come to terms with the fact that his body hadn’t died along with his mate before dealing with the demands of his libido.
The furious pounding of paws behind me had me whirling, a snarl peeling my lips away from my fangs.
I relaxed slightly when I saw the familiar figure of a chestnut brown wolf bearing down on me, but it was short-lived. He was growling and baring his own teeth at me, clearly enraged.
Without waiting for him, I shifted back to my human form and put my hands on my hips. “What the hell is your problem?” I yelled.
Lachlan slowed his approach, his ears turning back as he growled at me again.
“Stop with the growling bullshit, shift, and tell me what the problem is or I’m leaving.”
Smoothly, Lach’s body began to twist and move, the bones lengthening and the fur receding, but he didn’t pause in his charge. He leapt in the air, still mostly wolf, but landed in front of me in fully human form.
I often marveled at the ease of his change. While it was painful during the first transition in adolescence, our bodies grew accustomed and it became easier. Alphas found the shift easier than most and some, like Lach, were able to achieve it within a blink of an eye.
“What the fuck are you thinking?” he roared. “You know that it’s not safe here but you go out for a run alone or without even telling me where you’re going?”
“Lower your voice,” I hissed. “I don’t think anyone is watching or listening, but even if they aren’t, they probably heard you all the way in town.”
“Fuck that, Chloe. You put yourself in danger and that is unacceptable. I know you can fight, but you can’t take on a bullet.”
I wanted to fight, to wrap myself in righteous anger and stand toe-to-toe with him, but I couldn’t. Because he was right. After getting that note last night, I shouldn’t be running in the woods alone. Especially when no one knew where I was.
“You’re right,” I sighed. “I should have woken you or waited until you were awake and able to come with me.”
“Goddammit, Chloe!” he yelled, shoving his hands through his hair as he turned away from me, pacing wildly.
“What, Lachlan?” I spat back. “You’re right. I fucked up. I admitted it. What more do you want from me?”
He turned back toward me. “I’m pissed as hell, Chloe. I can’t take it out on you when you fucking apologize,” he stated.
If he had been anyone other than my mate, I would have thrown a punch. A good fight would let off enough steam for both of us to calm down. Violence was common in the shifter world, an outlet for our aggressive tendencies or a way to assert our dominance, but I couldn’t bring myself to hit Lachlan. I didn’t want to hurt him.
Another option would be a hard, fast fuck, but I wouldn’t suggest that either. If I had sex with him, I would bite him, mark him as mine, and he would hate me for it.
“What do you want me to do, Lach?” I asked, pitching my voice low in an effort to soothe his ragged temper.
His eyes flashed, the blue turning brighter, and they moved down my body.
I glanced down as well and saw he was fully erect. Aggressively so.
I tore my eyes away from his cock and met his gaze. “I’m heading back. When you’ve calmed down, we’ll talk.”
Without waiting for his answer, I shifted back to wolf form and ran back toward the cabin as if the Devil himself were on my tail.
A few moments later, I heard his paws striking the ground behind me, but he stayed several feet back all the way there.
When I reached the cabin, I shifted and walked past my clothes, straight into the house. My body tingled all over and I felt as though I were about to come out of my skin.
If I thought being close to Lachlan at the MacIntire compound was torture, it was nothing compared to this.
I went straight into the bathroom, shutting and locking the door behind me. Even though I’d taken a bath the night before, I turned on the shower and stepped inside. I bit back a curse at the cold temperature of the water but didn’t touch the taps. My blood still burned hot, full of lust and frustration.
I scrubbed my skin roughly with a washcloth, trying to dispel the prickling sensation. I gasped when the nubby fabric brushed my nipples, shooting arcs of heat from my breasts to my pussy. Determined to ignore the wild tension within me, I washed myself quickly, standing beneath the chilling spray until I shivered.
Finally, the clamor of my body subsided, leaving me hollow. It was more than a physical feeling of emptiness. After finding my mate in Lachlan, I realized there was a void in my soul. A place waiting within me, aching from the need to be filled. Every day I was in his presence, the throb intensified, demanding action from me.
A
fter I turned off the water, I realized that I hadn’t brought any clothes into the bathroom with me. Any other time, I wouldn’t have felt the least bit reticent about my nudity. It was just a part of pack life.
But with Lach’s presence in the other room and the tension between us, I needed the illusion of protection that my jeans and tank top would afford me. Biting back a sigh, I dried off with a towel and wrapped it around my body. I would just have to suck it up. I’d been doing it for months now, I could continue for a while longer.
I exited the bathroom, glad to see the cabin was empty and the clothes I’d been wearing before I shifted were neatly folded on the bed. Lachlan must have brought them inside. Walking over to the mattress, I turned my back to the open front door and dropped the towel.
I was just shimmying into my jeans when I heard the screen door creak open. I didn’t look over my shoulder and bent to pick up my olive green tank top, tugging it over my head. When the fabric was in place, I turned to face Lach.
He looked sheepish and sad, a combination that pierced my heart and made me want to go to him and give him a hug. I resisted the urge and stood my ground.
“I’m sorry, Chloe,” he said. “I shouldn’t have…” he trailed off as if he wasn’t sure what to say.
“Yelled at me? Gotten angry?” I asked, shaking my head. “I understand, Lach. You don’t have to beat yourself up for telling me the truth. I know better than to go for a run alone when there’s the possibility of danger. I would have done the same if our positions were reversed.” Actually, I probably would have been angrier. Especially with him.
He shoved his hands in his jean pockets. “It doesn’t excuse it. I am…was, an alpha. If I can’t control myself, how can I control the wolves I lead?”