Wild for You (Crave Book 2) Page 12

  I glanced down at my towel and decided not to mention it. Instead, I described what I intended to put on just as soon as I had the energy. "Ugh, fine. I'm wearing a huge t-shirt."

  "And?"

  "Uh, underwear. Enormous white granny panties."

  He chuckled again but didn't say anything.

  I waited a second. "Well?"

  "I'm saying nothing because that's what I'm wearing."

  I laughed but I also bit my knuckle. Ben wearing nothing was an amazing sight and I hated that I was missing it. Dammit, why was he torturing me like this?

  "Okay, now that we've established that I'm an old maid who wears muumuus and granny panties, why can't you sleep?" I asked, hoping to change the subject.

  "I have a problem."

  I frowned. "A problem? At work?"

  He cleared his throat. "It's more of a personal problem."

  I didn't get it, so I asked, "Is it something I can help with?"

  "It depends."

  Why was he being so evasive? "On what?"

  "If you're willing to tell me more about the ink on your arm."

  I huffed out a laugh. "Give it up. I'm a fortress."

  He sighed. "Okay, then maybe you can help me with the other problem I have but it also depends on your feelings."

  I couldn't help myself. I grinned. There was no telling what he was going to say next. "What feelings should I consider?"

  "Your feelings about phone sex."

  Oh. My. God. Every hormone in my body stood up and screamed, "Yes!!"

  The man was trying to drive me insane. That was the only explanation. We'd just agreed to be friends and he was already trying to get me to have sexy phone times with him. It wasn't nice, even though it sure as hell was tempting.

  "Sierra?" he asked. His voice was raspy in my ear, as though he were right here next to me, speaking against my skin.

  My nipples tightened and I wanted so badly to take this a step further. To let him talk me through what he imagined doing to me and for me to do the same.

  But that wasn't something friends did, was it? And if I opened that door, I would end up jumping on his joystick, literally instead of in my imagination. We weren't even one day into our agreement to just be friends and leave sex out of the equation.

  "I'm not opposed to the concept in general, but I don't have phone sex with my friends," I said, emphasizing the word. I wasn't sure if it was for his benefit or mine, so I kept my voice quiet in hopes that he wouldn't hear the tremor in it. If he knew how much I wanted to say yes, he would be over here, knocking on my window, and I would not be able to say no.

  "Damn. I guess I'll have to take care of the problem alone then."

  My throat felt tight. "Sorry I couldn't give you a hand."

  For fuck's sake, did I just say that?

  There was stunned silence on the other end of the phone before Ben cracked up. "Yes, you did just say that."

  Once again, I was speaking my thoughts aloud without realizing it. I was definitely exhausted, and I needed to get off the phone right this second.

  "Good luck with your problems," I choked out. "I'm helping Cam out tomorrow again, so I need to go to sleep."

  "Good night, Sierra," he murmured in my ear.

  "Night, Ben."

  I disconnected, wishing for the first time in a long, long time that the man I'd been talking to was in the bed next to me. Not for sex, but so I could roll over and curl up against him. To know he was there if I woke up in the middle of the night.

  Then I realized that he was probably cupping his erection right at this moment, stroking his fist up and down his length, and I bit back a moan.

  Before I could get too deep in the fantasy, I forced myself to stand up and unwrap my hair. I needed to get it as dry as possible before I put it up for the night or it would be a crazy mess in the morning. If I didn't do it now, I wouldn't do it at all.

  There was a knock on my door and I couldn't control the irritation in my voice when I said, "Come in."

  Cam stuck her head in the room. "Hey, you okay?"

  "Yeah, I'm okay." I sighed and lowered the towel from my hair.

  "What happened?" she asked.

  I couldn't suppress the growl. I was frustrated with him again, but no longer about the trash bag incident. She didn't need to know that though. "Ben Murphy happened."

  "How did Ben cause you to end up covered in ice cream?" she asked, sounding confused.

  "He tried to help me carry out the trash," I grumbled as I went back to scrubbing my hair dry. And he left me with a horrible case of blue bean that I couldn't take care of as long as Cam was around.

  "I didn't catch that," she said.

  With a groan, I gave up drying my hair and threw the towel on the end of the bed. If I kept this up, I'd be bald before I went to sleep. "I said that Ben tried to help me throw the trash into the dumpster behind the shop. For some reason, my being short and female equates with complete helplessness in his eyes. We were arguing and playing tug-of-war with two very full trash bags when they busted open. Somehow, I'm the only one who ended up covered in a million gallons of melted ice cream."

  "I'm sure he was just trying to help," Cam said.

  I just lifted my eyes and stared at her.

  Apparently, it wasn't a nice look because she recoiled and asked, "What?"

  "He's a good guy. I didn't recognize it at first because he looks like a bad boy, but he is. He's nice." There, I admitted it.

  "Um, I'm confused. Is nice a bad character trait in a man?" Cam asked.

  "You know what happens to the nice ones when I get involved." I frowned as I thought about Brian and how things had ended with him in the not-so-distant past.

  That couldn't happen again though because Ben knew where I stood. Right?

  "I don't think I do. Why don't you explain it to me?"

  I couldn't look at her while I said this, so I grabbed my nightclothes and underwear from the dresser and carried them into the bathroom. "I don't do well with good guys, Cam." I called out to her. "I chew them up and spit them out. I need someone who can stand up to me."

  "That sounds like it came out of someone else's mouth," she argued, lifting her voice so I could hear her.

  I bent over and wrapped the towel that had been around my body back around my hair. It was still too wet and I didn't want my t-shirt to get damp before I went to sleep.

  When I came out of the bathroom, Cam was still standing in the doorway, so I flopped facedown on the bed and said, "Yeah, well, more than one of my ex's have mentioned it before, so I'm pretty sure it's true."

  "Hey."

  I refused to look up and just grunted at her, hoping she would let this drop.

  "Sierra, look at me."

  I should have known that wouldn't work. Inhaling, I lifted my face to look at her.

  When she saw she had my attention, she said, "You are one of the strongest, smartest women I know. There are some men that can't handle that. And that's okay. That means he isn't the right man for you. But please don't discount someone who tries to treat you well. You deserve a man who wants to take care of you, even if you're more than capable of taking care of yourself."

  I wanted to believe her, I did. But Cam always tried to see the best in me, and in this case, I wasn't sure my best was what I'd given. So, I groaned, laid my head back down, and said, "Okay."

  Her voice was sharp when she stated, "Don't ignore what I'm saying."

  "I'm not. I agree with everything you're saying, but it doesn't make the past go away. Let's just say that Ben caught me on a bad day." I said all of this with my face pressed into the bed, the comforter muffling my voice.

  Cam was silent for a protracted moment before she finally said, "You know you can talk to me about anything, right?"

  I raised my head and rested my chin on my hand. "Yeah. I know. I'm just...not ready to say it out loud yet. I'll tell you about it. Just not tonight. Tonight I want to drink a glass of wine and go to sleep. Anything but
think."

  I was too tired to talk about all this heavy stuff tonight. If I did, there was no telling what I might blurt out to her.

  "Okay. Whenever you're ready to talk, I'll listen," she said, coming over to sit on the edge of the bed. "Want me to bring you that wine?"

  I shook my head. "Nah. I'll get up in a minute and grab it. Go sext your man."

  Her mouth fell open, lifting my spirits just a bit. "Excuse me?"

  I smirked at her. "Don't pretend you weren't about to climb him like a schoolyard jungle gym. Things were getting really hot in that kitchen. I may not have been in the best mood when I came home, but even I could feel the sexual tension dripping from the walls."

  "Dripping?" she asked with a grimace.

  "Bet it wasn't the only thing," I joked, giving her a light jab with my elbow.

  "You're gross. Remind me why we're friends again," she said with a little gag.

  "Because I always tell you the truth, even when you don't necessarily want to hear it."

  "And what's the truth?" She crossed her arms over her chest as she looked down at me.

  "That you've had feelings for this man for years and years and years. It's clear that he reciprocates, so maybe it's time to take a chance and see where it leads."

  "I already knew that," she said.

  "Yeah, but you still need me for moral support. Eventually, one of you is going to screw up and you'll need me to supply ice cream and a shoulder to cry on."

  "I can supply my own ice cream," she shot back.

  "Quit being such a pain in the ass and admit that you love me."

  "Fine. I love you. God knows why," she said with a sigh.

  "I knew it." I nudged her with my elbow a little harder.

  "Okay, you go get your wine. I'm going to bed. I have to get up early in the morning." She rose from the bed and headed toward the door, stopping just by the jamb. "Thanks for taking over the shop so I could have a weekend off. I didn't realize how much I needed it."

  I couldn't stop the grin that spread across my face. "No problem. I really enjoyed it. I've spent so many years working on my laptop with my ass planted on my couch that I've forgotten what it's like to put in a full day's work and see actual, physical results." I studied her for a minute and asked on a whim, "Would you mind having me here for a while longer?"

  "Of course not. It's nice to have some help. Are you thinking of extending your vacation?"

  I didn't speak for a long moment as my brain raced. This was one of those times I'd spoken without thinking, but now that I'd said it, my thoughts were moving so quickly that I couldn't keep them all straight.

  One thing was clear to me though. After one week, I wasn't ready to go back to my regular life. I liked spending time with Cam again. I liked working with her.

  So, I let my brain keep doing the talking for me and blurted out, "I'm thinking of looking for a house to rent. Or buy. I haven't decided yet."

  Yeah, I had no idea where that had come from either. It'd been in the back of my mind that I could live close to here and still work for the company that employed me, but this was the first time those thoughts had coalesced into actual statements.

  Cam's eyes were huge. I knew the feeling. "What about your job?" she asked.

  "I mostly work remotely and it's not like it's a long haul to Dallas from here. Only a couple of hours. If I absolutely have to go to the office, it's doable." As I spoke, I realized it was all true. I could make it work if I really wanted to. I swallowed hard, suddenly feeling the tears in the back of my throat. "I missed you more than I realized. At least until tonight when you wouldn't let me wallow."

  And that was it in a nutshell. Tonight had reminded me of the fact that I missed seeing Cam. When I was busy with work, I only noticed it on the weekends. But now that I was around her every day, I didn't want to go back to only seeing her once every couple of years.

  "What are friends for?" she asked.

  I had to shrug so she wouldn't know that I was close to crying. "Beats me."

  She flipped me off when she left the room and the only way I kept from crying was to laugh.

  12

  Three days later, I decided that I would take the first step toward being friends with Ben Murphy. It wasn't because I was afraid I'd never hear from him again if I didn't, I swear.

  Since I didn't trust myself not to jump him, I decided a semi-public meeting would be best. That meant I was going to go by his place of business. We could have privacy but there would be no convenient beds nearby.

  I grabbed a couple of pizzas from the local joint because, let's be real, I could eat an entire medium cheese pizza by myself. There's no shame in my game.

  I knew where his shop was because I passed it on the way to Crave whenever I came into town to help Cam.

  Cassie, his office manager, smiled at me when I came in the door. "Hi, can I help you?" she asked.

  "I'm here to see Ben. Is he in?"

  Her face shut down and I immediately wondered if Cassie was one of his many admirers in town. Before she could answer my question, the side door opened and Ben walked in, wiping his hands on a shop towel as he came into the office. His eyes lit up when he saw me standing there.

  "Please tell me one of those is for me," he said, grinning.

  I smiled back, feeling a little awkward with Cassie watching the exchange. "Yep. Pepperoni and jalapeno just for you."

  "I'm starving. I didn't have time for a real lunch today. Let me go wash up and I'll meet you in my office." He glanced at Cassie. "Can you show Sierra where it is, Cass?"

  His office manager nodded. Her eyes were wide.

  "Thanks."

  Ben rounded the counter and vanished down the hall into the bathroom.

  I turned to Cassie, whose eyes were still huge and on me.

  When she realized I was waiting for her to say something, she started. "Oh, his office is this way." She came around the counter and led me to a closed door to the left of the counter.

  After Cassie opened the door to let me in, I set the pizzas on top of his shockingly clean desk.

  When I faced her, I found Cassie studying me, a bemused expression on her face.

  "Is something wrong?" I asked. My first instinct was to throw around attitude, but I tamped it down because it was ridiculous. Cassie was blonde and pretty and at least five years younger than me. Maybe more. So that reaction was petty and fueled by envy and definitely not the one a friend should have.

  "No, just surprised."

  "By me?" I asked. Maybe throwing attitude was the right reaction after all.

  She shook her head. "By the boss. He usually asks me to run interference if a woman shows up here with food."

  "Does that happen often?"

  "Not so much anymore but when he first hired me..."

  I nodded in understanding. A hot, rich bachelor in a small town? Yeah, I could see that.

  "Have y'all been dating long?" she asked, a little hesitant.

  "We're not dating," I replied with a shrug. "We're just buds."

  Cassie blinked at me. "Just...what?"

  "Buddies. Friends. Pals."

  "Oh. That's nice."

  She sounded like she didn't believe me but I was saved from embarrassing myself when Ben came up behind her.

  "Thanks, Cass. I locked up the shop. The guys are about to head out and I think Tyler is waiting in the car for you. See you tomorrow morning."

  "Bye, Boss." She waved at me. "It was nice to meet you, Sierra."

  "Nice to meet you, Cassie."

  She skirted around Ben and walked out of the front door a few seconds later, a purse over her shoulder. She turned to lock the door and gave us both another wave.

  Ben waited, watching her until she climbed into the passenger seat of a truck with a guy about her age. Once they took off, he shut off the main light in the lobby and closed the door to his office, giving us privacy from anyone who might pull up and look inside.

  "Will you grab some drinks out
of the mini-fridge in the corner?" he asked.

  "Sure, what do you want?" I asked.

  "A water."

  Water with pizza? The guy needed to live a little.

  I did as he asked, grabbing a Coke for myself. He pulled a small package of paper plates and matching napkins out of his filing cabinet. The plates read "Happy Birthday!" in a rainbow of colors, as did the napkins. He also grabbed a straw, which he handed to me.

  "Happy birthday to me," I murmured.

  Ben grinned. "They're leftover from Cassie's birthday. Tyler, her boyfriend, set up a surprise party for her a couple of months ago but we didn't use all the stuff."

  I brought the drinks over to the desk and plopped down in Ben's chair. He didn't say anything, but his smile grew as he sat in the chair on the other side. The one reserved for his customers.

  I threw open the lid of the top pizza box and dropped a couple of pieces of pepperoni and jalapeno pizza on a plate. Ben grabbed the box and moved it so I could open my cheese pizza.

  I put a couple of pieces on my plate and we settled down in our chairs to eat.

  I took a huge bite and moaned at the delicious blend of cheese that melted in my mouth. Ben's eyes came to me and they were hot.

  Crap. Moaning over good food was probably a bad idea since we were trying this whole friends-only thing.

  I chewed and swallowed, trying to ignore the way he was looking at me. "So, does Cassie clean your office?"

  He shook his head. "Nope. She's got her own desk and computer and she handles invoices and stuff from there. Why?"

  I shrugged a shoulder and put my pizza to the side to open my can of Coke. "It's just tidier than I expected from a guy."

  His eyebrows lifted. "That's sexist of you."

  "Probably." Shoot, maybe I should feel guilty for being mad about the whole trash incident from Sunday night, after all. Here I was thinking he couldn't keep a clean office because he was a guy. Talk about a double standard.

  He chuckled at my response. "When it comes to business, I like to know where everything is. Plus I don't spend a lot of time in here, so it doesn't get too messed up." His eyes focused on me. "What about you? Do you only work on your couch?"

  "Most of the time. Sometimes I go to a coffee shop or a bookstore, but I usually need privacy to work. Or I need to work on my desktop if I'm on a big project." I glanced at his computer. "Speaking of that, when was the last time you bought a computer for your office?"