Only for You (Crave Book 3) Read online

  However, the attorney had tried to talk me into putting other clauses or monetary compensation in the agreement, but I refused. I wanted J.J. to know that I wasn't going to come after him for money in the event things didn't work out.

  I wanted to start our marriage off on the right foot.

  I heard a car turn into the drive and a flurry of activity from the living room. Curious, I walked out of my bedroom and found Colette and my mother blocking the door and J.J. on the other side, the envelope in his hand.

  "I know it's our wedding day, but I need to talk to Lee," J.J. was saying as I came around the corner.

  He must have sensed my movement when I stopped in the doorway because he looked up and locked eyes with me. Then, he stilled.

  "You look beautiful," he said.

  I smiled and felt my cheeks heat. "Thank you."

  "Aw, dammit," my mother said.

  I glanced at her with wide eyes. My mother rarely so much as said "crap" much less an actual curse word, so it was a bit of a surprise.

  "Well, you've already set yourself up for bad luck," Colette said primly, stepping to the side. "So I guess you might as well come in and talk to her anyway since it can't wait."

  They stood on each side of the door, their arms crossed. J.J. gave them both a wary look before he came inside and walked toward me.

  "Is there somewhere we can talk without an audience?" he asked.

  The walls in the house were thin, but my bedroom was the furthest from the kitchen and living area, so I gestured for him to follow me.

  I didn't realize until we were in my bedroom with the door shut behind us, that he hadn't been back in here since the night of Cam's wedding. The subtle glance he shot the bed reminded me of everything that happened that night and how it felt, and the heat in my cheeks spread to the rest of my body.

  "What's wrong?" I asked when it seemed all he was going to do was stare at my bed.

  J.J.'s eyes shot to me and he lifted the envelope. "A prenup?" he asked.

  I nodded. "Absolutely."

  He tossed the envelope onto the bed. "I realize that we discussed dissolving our marriage once you no longer needed my help but why didn't you tell me you wanted a prenuptial agreement?"

  "I honestly didn't think about it until a couple of days ago," I answered. "And I didn't ask you because I know you're a decent guy and you would say no because you didn't want me to feel like you only cared about the money. But I think it's important we have some sort of agreement in place for the future. It will keep things from getting...messy."

  J.J. scrubbed his hands over his face and I noticed his outfit. He wore a pair of simple dark slacks and a crisp white button-down shirt. He looked handsome and he smelled delicious.

  "Lee, I know we discussed this marriage being temporary, but you sound like you've already got one foot out the door."

  "No, I'm planning for the future," I stated.

  "What happens if one of us doesn't want a divorce?" he asked.

  I blinked at him for a moment, trying to process his words. "You mean, me? Or you?"

  "Either of us," he answered, waving a hand.

  "Then, I suppose we would have to talk about it."

  He stared at me, long and hard. "But would you talk to me about it if you were the one who didn't want a divorce?"

  I blinked again. "What do you mean?"

  He sighed and sat on the edge of my bed, his shoulders rounded as though in defeat. "Lee, I realize that you're worried that I might feel pressured in this situation, but I don't. If you think back, I'm the one who suggested marriage. I didn't bring up the option for divorce until you made it clear you didn't want to be trapped with me as a spouse. If anyone should feel pressured here, it's you."

  I opened my mouth then shut it. I had no idea what to say.

  "I have no idea how you really feel about this because you haven't talked to me about it yet. I don't want you to feel pressured and I don't want you to feel like you have to hide your feelings from me. When I proposed marriage, I meant a real marriage. But you made it clear that you're not ready for that and I understood. But now I feel like you're already marking down the days until you can file for divorce and I'm worried that you don't want to do this and you feel like you have to."

  Whoa, that was...a lot.

  I moved to sit next to him, shoving the brown envelope out of the way. I had to gather my courage because other than our first and only night together, I hadn't made the first move in any of our interactions. It had been him asking for more and accepting less.

  I reached out and took his hand in mine. "I do want to marry you, J.J. I don't know if I'm ready for 'a real marriage' as you put it, but I want to have a chance to get to know you as a person before our baby comes. And I want you to be a part of the pregnancy because I can tell you really want to be. I also want you to be a part of the baby's life. It's important for the baby and for you and me, too." I swallowed hard. "I can't predict how either of us will feel in six months or a year because even though we've known each other for a long time, it's different when you're romantically involved and living together. For all you know, I could drive you nuts with my need for tidiness or my obsession with having lists and plans for almost every aspect of my life."

  "Or I could be a complete slob who drinks beer in my underwear all weekend and refuses to shower," J.J. said.

  I laughed a little. "So, what I'm saying, is that I'm okay with starting from a place of friendship but being open to more, but I never wanted you to feel like I expected you to support me financially or that I wanted to take advantage of this situation. That's why I arranged the prenup." I paused. "And you never know, I may own a stake in Cam's franchise in a few years and this prenup could turn out better for me than you."

  J.J. laughed and shook his head. "I never could get a read on you when we were kids and I can see it hasn't changed."

  "Really?" I asked. "I always felt like I wore my heart on my sleeve."

  J.J. scoffed. "Uh, no. You were always so quiet and still. I never could tell what you were thinking until you came out and said it. And half the time, even then it surprised me because it wasn't what I expected."

  I squeezed his hand. "Well, then I'll try to be a little more open with you about what I'm thinking."

  He stared at me and the sun from my open blinds glinted in his hazel eyes, making them glow. His free hand came up to cup my cheek. "You look so beautiful today."

  I swallowed as my heart skipped a few beats. "Thank you. You look handsome, too."

  "Think my mother will bust in here and swat me if I give you a kiss?" he asked, his voice barely a whisper.

  "No, but mine might." My words arrested his leaning toward me. "But I'll protect you."

  I could see the smile in his eyes since his face was too close for me to see his mouth. Then, he kissed me, nothing more than a brush of lips and light gust of his breath.

  It made everything inside me still.

  The anxiety, the doubt, the queasiness all disappeared for the briefest second. I was calm and I knew I was doing the right thing.

  When he leaned back and released me, I almost collapsed against him, but managed to hold myself upright.

  "I'll sign the prenup on one condition," he said.

  My eyes narrowed as I studied him and the smirk on his face. He was definitely up to something. "And what is that?"

  "You accept my wedding gifts without saying anything but thank you. No, 'I can't take this.' No, 'you shouldn't have.' Unless it's 'thank you, I love it' or 'thank you, it's gorgeous.' Or 'thank you, you're the most amazing man alive.' I don't want to hear it."

  I laughed. "If that's what it takes, I'll suffer through holding back my complaints."

  "Okay, then. Gifts first and if you follow through on your part of the bargain, I'll follow through on mine. Now, close your eyes."

  I did as he said and tried not to laugh. We were still holding hands, so he turned them over, holding mine palm up, and placed a small box in
side.

  "Can I—"

  "Nope," he said before he shushed me. "I'll tell you when it's time."

  I sighed and kept my eyes closed. He released my hands and got to his feet. I heard a box open with a creak of small hinges and then snap shut.

  "I was going to give these to you at the courthouse, but I think this worked out for the best. Hold still because I don't want to get this tangled up in your hair."

  I sat very still as he draped something thin and cool around my neck. A necklace. He reached around my neck beneath the curtain of my hair and fastened it on one side before straightening it so that the pendant lay against my breastbone.

  "There. I have the earrings to match, but I'm not going to put those in your ears. I'd end up hurting you."

  I asked, "Can I open my eyes?"

  "Nope."

  I laughed again. "Hurry up. I'm getting dizzy."

  I wasn't but I was dying of curiosity.

  He took the box from my palm, flipped my hand over, and slid a ring on the fourth finger of my left hand. "There. Fits perfectly. Now, you can open your eyes."

  The first thing I did was look down at my left hand.

  I gasped and stared at the sparkling diamond engagement ring on my finger. "Jay, I—" I slammed my mouth shut and glared up at him. "That was a sneaky thing to do."

  He grinned down at me, clearly pleased that I'd almost forgotten about our deal. It was the same mischievous grin he wore when he was in high school.

  And I was just as susceptible to it now as I had been back then.

  "It's beautiful. Thank you," I said quietly. I stared down at the ring, dazzled by the vintage setting. The white gold ring was studded with tiny diamonds and filigree in the shape of a flower. In the center was a sparkling diamond much bigger than I expected, not that I'd been expecting it at all. It was gorgeous. Perfect. The kind of ring I dreamed of when I thought about getting married.

  Yet it felt like a lie and it made me want to cry.

  Still beaming, he helped me up off the bed and took another larger jewelry box from his pocket, one that was big enough for a necklace and earring set.

  He pulled me over to the full-length mirror and I was almost afraid to look. But I did.

  A pendant hung from my neck, a pretty constellation of tiny pink freshwater pearls and diamonds. I reached up and touched the delicate piece with one finger. "I love it," I said finally.

  "Your mom said it would go perfectly with your dress and she was right."

  "Mom saw this?" I asked.

  He nodded and opened the box in his hand, turning it so I could see the matching earrings on grey velvet. "She helped me pick them both out."

  They were the same style as the pendant, but on a smaller scale, and exactly something I would've picked out for myself. Just like the necklace and the ring.

  Mom definitely would have noticed that and made a mental note. The fact that he picked something I would have chosen would seem like a good sign to her.

  I hoped she was right.

  There was a knock on my bedroom door.

  "We have to be at the courthouse in thirty minutes," my mother called.

  J.J. handed me the box. "Please put these on."

  I took the box and said, "I'll do that while you sign the prenup."

  He glanced at the envelope on the bed. "I guess a deal's a deal."

  A few minutes later, both of our tasks were done and we looked at each other from across my bedroom.

  "Ready to get married?" he asked.

  This time, I didn't hesitate to answer, "Yes."

  11

  The ceremony was short and sweet. Because of how large our families were, we ended up moving into one of the empty courtrooms. The judge stood in front of the bench rather than behind it and our parents, sibling, their spouses, and the kids sat in the wooden rows on the other side of the low wooden partition. Cam and Sierra were there with Brody and Ben. Even Mrs. Phelps was there. She was smiling so wide that I was a little worried her false teeth would fall out.

  It wasn't exactly what I imagined my wedding would be, but it was pretty darn close.

  I struggled to stay focused on the vows as J.J. faced me and held both of my hands in his. He didn't look stressed or anxious. Only calm and maybe even happy.

  With his eyes on mine, he smiled when he recited his vows and it was impossible not to smile back at him.

  The gleam in his eyes seemed to say that we were in this together, no matter what happened, and it was exactly what I needed at the moment.

  The judge's words seemed very far away but the world snapped back into focus when he said, "You may kiss the bride."

  Much like he'd done in my bedroom earlier, J.J. cupped my face, with both hands this time, and leaned down to kiss me.

  Without stopping to overthink it, I rose up on my toes to lift my mouth to his.

  I'd promised him earlier that I would try to be more open with my thoughts and emotions and this was a first step, no matter how small it seemed.

  This kiss wasn't as light or brief, but the sweetness was still there. His thumbs swept my cheekbones when it ended, and I dropped back down onto my heels.

  "Thank you," he said, and I knew he'd understood why I'd met him halfway.

  I only smiled, still feeling the aftereffects of that kiss.

  The moment was broken by the cheers and applause from our families. J.J. released me and stepped back when the judge reached out to shake our hands and extend his well-wishes. He politely declined our invitation to the reception, stating his wife had arranged a "date night" and it was best not to mess with her plans.

  After we thanked him and received hugs and kisses from everyone in the family, we were ushered out of the courthouse by a harried clerk who wanted to lock up for the day. I'd ridden to the courthouse with my mother and Colette, but I rode with J.J. to Crave.

  When we parked in front of the building, I reached out and placed a hand on his forearm.

  "I forgot to give you your wedding presents earlier," I said.

  J.J. leaned back in his seat. "I didn't expect—"

  I lifted a hand. "I didn't expect you to, either, so we're even."

  He grinned and stopped arguing.

  Compared to the jewelry he'd purchased for me, I was almost ashamed to give him his gift, but I refused to give in to the emotion. J.J. and I were in different places in our careers right now and I'd gotten him the best I could afford.

  During our shopping trip in Dallas to get my wedding dress, I'd walked past a store that specialized in monogrammed and etched gifts and gone inside on a whim. While I was there, I found a sterling silver set intended for a man. It included a key ring and money and tie clips.

  I intended to get his initials etched into the silver, but when the clerk asked if they were for a special occasion, my mother had piped in that I was getting married and they were a wedding gift for my fiancé. So, instead of his initials, they were engraved with an intertwined L and J, the first initials of our names.

  At the time, it seemed a little hypocritical to me, but after my conversation with him earlier, I was glad my mother had made her offhand comment.

  I handed the small box, neatly wrapped in silver paper, to him. J.J. stared at me for a moment before he finally opened it.

  When he picked up the key ring first and saw the keys dangling from it, he gave me a questioning look.

  "Keys to the house," I said. "Since you're officially living with me as of today, I thought you might need them."

  He flashed me a grin then his eyes focused on the engraving and his smile softened into something more tender.

  "Thank you," he said. "They're beautiful."

  I laughed since that was the exact phrase he'd wanted me to use when he'd given me my gifts earlier. "I think you forgot something."

  Again, he shot me a confused look.

  "You're the most amazing woman alive?" I prompted.

  J.J. laughed with me and leaned in to kiss my cheek. "You ar
e the most amazing woman alive, but don't expect me to tell you that in front of my mother or sister."

  We were both laughing as we exited the car and were met by the photographer Colette insisted on hiring.

  The next twenty minutes were a blur of pictures and positioning. I was shifting on my sore feet for the third time in as many minutes when J.J. called a halt to the proceedings.

  "That's enough posed pictures," he stated to his mother. "Lee needs to sit down, put her feet up, and get something to eat."

  Colette looked like she wanted to argue until she looked at my feet. "Oh, sweetie, your poor feet are so swollen."

  Within minutes, I was settled at a table next to J.J. with my shoes off and Colette sent Cam into the kitchen to get a pan full of cool water for my feet.

  J.J. sat next to me and I watched with wide eyes as a group of people came in carrying boxes and bags full of food.

  "What's this?" I asked J.J., leaning closer so no one could overhear me.

  When we'd talked about the reception, there was a discussion of cake and champagne. Well, champagne for everyone else, sparkling grape juice for me. But no one had mentioned food. But the bakery in town didn't have time to make us a cake, so Cam mentioned putting together ice cream sundaes as our reception food. It was fine by me because I was beginning to get strange cravings, which did include the stereotypical ice cream, but usually topped with fudge, pretzels, and bacon crumbles. Cam said she was putting it on her menu and calling it the "Lee Special."

  J.J. put his mouth next to my ear and murmured, "Your mom and my mom teamed up and put this together. I think you'll like it."

  I glanced over at him, our faces a few inches apart. "What—" Then, I smelled it. There was a steakhouse aptly named Chop about thirty miles from Farley that had the best prime rib I'd ever tasted. I very rarely got to go because I was on a strict budget and it wasn't cheap.

  My mouth watered and I sat up taller in my chair. J.J. chuckled next to me.

  I didn't even want to think about what it had cost to have them cater our reception, but gratitude filled me. I looked over to my mother, who was helping with the unpacking, and then Colette, who was talking to a young woman with vibrant purple hair and several tattoos on her forearms and hands.